Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Very Small Rocks

I had a dream the other night that I was in my parents' garden and they rolled a giant rock out of it and it rolled right at me. I dodged it once, but then it rolled back, right on top of me. Just as I was yelling "HELP!" they looked up and I woke up. I always wake up before the worst part of a dream – even those that don't involve my own demise.

So I woke up and I immediately began thinking "what the hell was THAT?"

I don't usually ponder the meanings of my dreams. I've had relatively few that I could figure out even if I tried. The most vivid was one I had as a child – about four. A large crowd of people – including my mother, my father and me – were running in a field, being chased by a herd of buffalo. The sky was dark with a looming storm. My mother and father were at the front of this crowd and tossing me back and forth between them. My mother was wearing a green vinyl trench coat. Did I mention they were newly separated at the time? I think it was a warning about my aversion to crowds. And buffalo.

The only other one I can recall offhand was about a former boss, whom I respect deeply. I had an image of him in a bathtub having been electrocuted with a toaster. That one freaked me out. So I asked my mom what death meant in dreams. She assured me that it was all about change, which kind of made sense, since we had just acquired a new toaster at the kitchenette. I failed to mention the bathtub and the nakedness. I don't want to know what that meant. (He's alive and well, by the way. And clothed, I presume.)

Now, I often don't pick up on metaphors and deeper meanings unless they are explained to me in very small words (high-school English was a bitch), but I sort of decided that the big giant rock was something that was overwhelming me.

I discussed this with Max, who, after mocking me soundly about dreaming about giant rocks (that's just how we roll – HAW!), analyzed – probably correctly – that may I have some difficulty in breaking down problems/issues into manageable pieces. It's all or nothing. Give'er pig. Go big or go home. And then, bleh... I'm done. Burned out. But hey! I'm done, so I can just rest. This MO would often work out just fine in my pre-child years, in an apartment, but now it does not serve me well. There is no rest, there's just the next project or task or crisis (did you know I made a whole freaking RAGGEDY ANN doll? Embroidery and everything?) So I'll consider it. Because, hey, I like rest as much as the next guy. Maybe more.

And what the hell is up with the fucking brain anyway? Why can't it just say "HEY! YOUR PARENTS ARE SEPARATING!" or "HEY! YOU'RE MORE WORRIED THAN YOU THINK ABOUT THE CHANGES AT WORK!" or

"HEY!!! STUPID!!! TRY TACKLING YOUR PROBLEMS IN SMALLER PARTS!"

I can't help but note that if I were to break up this "rock" into manageable "pieces" that a pile of gravel that size would still kill me. But maybe I take the metaphor too far.

I also note that Max wasn't in this dream, and have concluded that he must have been holding the rock back, and is actually the reason I was able to wake up at all.

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7 comments:

  1. What if Max is the rock? And he was in a restless sleep, rolling onto your side of the bed? When a more literal interpretation of the imagery is available, why stretch for these dubious metaphors?

    Sounds like you've been watching too much Oprah.
    And not enough 30 Rock.

    Maybe the rock is 30 Rock, and you're worried about turning into Liz Lemon. Or Jack Donaghy.

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  2. I think that's reasonably sound advice, though actually *taking* that advice would be another thing entirely. Safer to just admire the shiny words of wisdom from a nice, safe distance.

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  3. and then again maybe it's just a dream? did you know that dreams are like the VCR of your brains all mixed up and pressed fast forward? were you playing SimCity recently?

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  4. I wrote about my most pervasive dream before: http://talesfromthedadside.blogspot.com/2008/05/early-memories.html.

    (Sorry for the link; it's just a long story to explain.)

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  5. wow, i would never have thought, 'hey, this rock probably signifies that i need to learn to break my problems into more manageable pieces.' i'm pretty sure i'm operating along the wavelength that says, 'shit. i better start watching out for giant rocks coming after me. damn'

    i'm smarticle.

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  6. Yikes! I never remember my bad dreams. Happily, I do remember dreams where I travel to exotic countries and hook up with cute guys in their 20s. Seriously.
    Whatever does this dream mean, you think?

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  7. Well, if Max was holding the rock, well, I think lots of gravel would be a lot harder to manage...unless he had a wheel barrow.

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